Yes, the “Don’t Tread on Me”-government-hating government worker did go to a meditation center, in a rare moment of deference to his health-nut pseudo-boss Chris (Rob Lowe), who sometimes goes in for spiritual or even New Agey stuff. But Ron’s only along to get chummy enough with Chris that he can keep his plum job of being paid to do as little as possible.

So what did Ron do in there if he wasn’t meditating? Chris may think that a post-sit Ron “radiates mindfulness” but as Ron himself puts it:

All told, we were in there about six hours. And no, I was not meditating. I just stood there quietly breathing. There were no thoughts in my head whatsoever; my mind was blank.* I don’t know what those crackpots [in there] were doing.

Of course, Ron has been warned. When he asks Anne (Rashida Jones) what to expect from meditation, she answers right away: “It’s crazy boring, it lasts forever, you’re going to wish you were dead.”

Chris (Rob Lowe) meditates; Ron prefers to stand

When the obsessively individualistic Ron tells us that meditation does nothing for him, there’s reason to believe him. But then, the important thing is that he’s tried it. Even if he didn’t get anything out of it. The enthusiastic and impulsive (and often wrong) Chris agrees: Ron’s willingness to try meditation (even if he tells us that he hasn’t tried it) is impressive. He assures Ron that his plum-job security will be extended.

Later — there are plenty more meditation jokes in the episode, by the way, and other storylines, too — Ron does revisit meditation, even bringing it into the workplace… but just as a cover for work avoidance.

So maybe Ron Swanson and meditation weren’t a natural pair. Again: The important thing is that he tried it — even if he didn’t get anything out of it.

And even if he really did.

* Note: Yes, some of that ironic stuff Ron is saying about meditation, like about having a blank mind, etc, isn’t quite representative of many meditation experiences, not least Buddhist meditation experiences. And so it could be said that some of the jokes, which are about the fact that Ron actually was meditating, when he thinks he wasn’t, don’t totally work. But then, it’s Nick Offerman delivering the jokes, so it all balances out.  

Related: Watch Steven Colbert challenge the Dalai Lama in a competition to be the more influential of TIME’s “100 Most Influential List”

Bodhichitta Skt., lit., “awakened mind”; the mind of enlightenment, one of the central no­tions of Mahāyāna Buddhism. In the Tibetan tradition it is seen as having two aspects, rela­tive and absolute. The relative mind of enlight­enment is divided again into two phases (1) the intention and wish, nurtured by limitless com­passion, to attain liberation (nirvāna) for the sake of the welfare of all beings and (2) actual entry into meditation, the purpose of which is the acquisition of the appropriate means to ac­tualize this wish. The absolute mind of enlightenment is viewed as the vision of the true nature of phenomena. The various methods for arousing the mind of enlightenment stem primarily from Atīsha and entered into all schools of Tibetan Bud­dhism through him.

Pretty heady stuff, eh? Thank god we can just forget about all that, and simply think of it, instead, as a new line of bubble baths:
.

“Bodhichitta — You’re soaking in it!”

Thanks to my brother Konchog Norbu for the heads-up (and photo) on this one. As always. …And if you’re into this sort of thing, go here to learn more about the Bodhichitta product line.

After the jump: the film’s loud, action-packed trailer.

Beyond Hollywood says the film will be released next month. I’ll probably give it a rental. What about you? (Thanks to my friend Sam DeWitt for the heads-up!)

And The Cult’s weapon of choice? The dorje – in Buddhism, a symbol of enlightenment. In a new Rolling Stone article, we’re told the “shamanic figure” on the LP’s cover, seen here, is holding a dorje… but I must confess I’m not quite able to make it out. (Perhaps in full-size?) Anyway, Astbury talks about the dorje, and a lot more — really, worth the quick read — in the interview, here.

And if you wanna hear “Lucifer,” the lead single from the record, you preview it via the Rolling Stone link above, or download it via the band’s website.

The person who made me aware of the video’s existence criticizes Sullivan’s take as “shallow.” He goes on: “Again with the ‘extinguishing of the individual,’ the nihilist error. The point being, of course, that *no* independent self can be identified or proven as having *ever* existed as an entity beyond false concepts imputed on the dependently arisen, temporarily-hung-together, psychophysical array – i.e., there’s nothing to extinguish except erroneous ideas that keep us in cycles of dissatisfaction. Who wouldn’t want to extinguish those? All Buddhism asks is that we give up false ideas. But don’t expect a political commentator to embrace that any time soon. [...] I do agree with him that Merton’s cool, though.”

What do you think?

UPDATE: The same person who commented above now writes with this update:

“A reader has followed up with Andrew, quite intelligently and gently. I don’t know what’s the matter with me. Maybe my perception of his attitude set me off. Also I said ‘nihilist’ when I should have said ‘eternalist.’ Now who’s the dope?” Click here to read the followup post.

“I wanted to let you know about a book that might be of interest to your readers. It’s called “Buddhism in the Modern World,” edited by David McMahan. The reason your readers might care — apart from it being a pretty accessible book about the various iterations of Buddhism in the contemporary world — is that the last chapter, by me, is about Buddhism and media and pop culture. And I make several references to the Worst Horse because, well, if you’re gonna write a chapter about Buddhism and pop culture, you gotta mention the Worst Horse!”

Well, dang, Scott. Thanks for that. I can’t wait to see the book — luckily, it’s on its way.

As for you, dear reader, to order yourself a copy, just click here. And let us know what you think when you’ve had a look.

Photp by Kristin Dos Santos (w/permission)

Thanks to friend Konchog Norbu for the heads-up on this one — it’s hardly news, but it’s kinda cool when celebs go public with their interest in dharma. Seems David Duchovny (of Californication, X-Files, and Larry Sanders-crush fame) just did a retreat at what sounds to be Zen Mountain Monastery, and he’s told Perez Hilton’s pet-gossip site (yes, you read that right) TeddyHilton.com about the experience.

Again, not news, but at least Duchovny’s not looking for star treatment. “I’m a beginner,” he says, “I’ve only been meditating for a little while. You pay a fee to go for this weekend and what I didn’t know is that even though you pay a fee they put you to work immediately. You go there and first you bus some tables after you eat and they had me working in the garden everyday for an hour-and-a-half. It was fun, I was shoveling horse shit out there. You pay money and then you shovel horse shit!”

Zen, life…. Sounds like Duchovny is getting the basic gist of it.

More here.

So is he Buddhist? I can’t really tell. His new album is called “A Great Stillness.” That seems like something, no? A Google search turns up a reference or two or three to Pepitone from Zen teacher Brad Warner — who counts the comic among his favorites — and some gags from the Pepitone’s Twitter feed:

• “Watching Saturday Night Live is like watching a Buddhist monk light himself on fire except for no reason.”
• “As a buddhist child I got teased a lot for renouncing all thought.”
• “I studied zen Buddhism with Maharishi Gus Lobotomovich and he always said “shit, did you hear that?”

And here’s a quote from a new AV Club interview with Pepitone: “You wanna give life meaning against all of this pain and anguish. You’re trying to give it meaning and you’re trying to be happy, but you have all this stuff that is in the way. And that’s the stuff I talk about.”

Know anything about the Bitter Buddha? Let us know.

Sounds pretty good, doesn’t it? So have yourself a Happy Day of Goodwill today. Who cares what the date is?

I always wondered what happened to those guys. Well, now I have some answers, thanks to Marc Maron and the newest installation of his fantastic comedy-insider podcast, WTF, which features non-comedian Dr. Stephen Dansiger – psychotherapist, happy family man, and lifetime musician who’s played with some great bands, including Pianosaurus. So: why is this relevant to this blog? Well, Dansiger is also a Zen meditator now. (He’s friends, too, with Josh Korda of Dharma Punx.) And he talks about all of this, and how he’s gotten to the other side of some seriously rough times, on WTF. Click here to listen online. Or download via iTunes.

Warning: if you’re not comfortable with the word that the “F” in “WTF” represents, this won’t be easy listening for you. But it’s a good listen nonetheless.